3 things from Portal 2 I wish were real

By Alex Maidment (nSanity Beach)

If you haven’t played Portal or Portal 2, I thoroughly recommend them! Also, spoilers ahead.

The Portal game series are brilliant, no two ways about it – they have stood the test of time and 12 years after the first game and 7 years after the 2nd, I still sink hours in the series.

The logic-based (and sometimes slightly illogical) puzzles can keep me busy for hours and the futuristic ideas thought up by Aperture Science (and in the real world, Valve) are really cool. Obviously I’m not advocating the testing regime run by Aperture Science in the games but wow, the technology in the games is amazing!

In fact, some of the ideas and innovations in the game are so cool that I wish they were real and I could have them. Here’s the top three things I wish were real from Portal 2 (and from the game series in general).

3. Wheatley

Yes, he turns out to be a little bit evil but the ball-shaped AI helper starts as a goofy companion and a funny one at that. Voiced by Stephen Merchant, a British (Bristolian, to be precise) comedian, writer and actor, I would love to have my very own Wheatley to guide me through life adding comedic relief and insulting my intelligence.

Think of it like this, the AI could be your ultimate knowledge source and make life so much more interesting as you go about you daily life. Sign me up for my very own Wheatley.

2. The Gels

Throughout Portal 2 you rely on various gels to complete the puzzles.

These gels are another innovation that I can only dream of being real. Repulsion gel is a blue substance that you can put on a surface and then effectively bounce things off – fun!

Propulsion gel is an orange gel and helps you speed along like a giant slip and slide – fun and exciting!

And last, but not least, conversion gel is a white gel that gives you the ability to put portals on walls that you can’t normally – convenient!

The closest I think I’ll ever get to the gels is building a PC with liquid calling that looks like Portal gels, a future project for myself. Maybe I could even make the front and back look like portal rings.

1. Portal Gun

Number one was always going to be the portal gun. A weapon or tool that basically allows you to create blue and orange portals on suitable surfaces (hence wanting conversion gel to be real).

The uses could be amazing, for example, I could leave a Portal at work and then just walk through in the morning and vice versa in the evening. Or I could have a portal from the living room to the fridge for cold snacks and drinks! Ah, it would be awesome.

These are just three things I want from the Portal 2 and I’m sure there are many others that you all want – some of the other things that almost made the list include: Chell’s boots – they look wicked, Companion Cube – because I always need a doorstop and not to forget the turrets as they would make semi-competent defences for my house.

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